Is there a word?

There don't seem to be words in the English language to describe my current mix of thoughts and emotions. It's a combination of awe, desire to know what is ahead, excitement, terror, calmness, realization that I am not capable, peace, elation, knowledge that God is enough, not wanting to know what is ahead, desire to be completely surrendered, panic, humility, awareness of the presence of God, anxiety, and 'wow' at what God is doing. Is there a word for all of that?

We leave for Cambodia on Thursday. Here is the team blog if you would like to follow along the journey. http://web.mac.com/jbingham1/FreedomCambodia2009